unabashedly uncorked: your daily dose of EPH!

Of course I celebrated my great news the best way I know how…

new shoes! ((ps- 30% off with code BRAPRIL30))

I had my 3 month check-up with my Oncologist on Tuesday. For the first time in months, I wasn’t paralyzed with fear as I walked into the hospital. (I could talk here about my panic attacks I experienced post treatment but we’ll save that topic for another day)

I actually forgot about my blood work they had run [which would NEVER have been the case a few short months ago] and I figured since I hadn’t heard anything as of yesterday morning, I might as well touch base and be sure all of the results looked good.

Let me also interject here and say that the Nurse Clinician @ UNC is beyond the greatest woman alive. She’s kind, patient, and even keeled which is a welcome change of pace to my energetically charged sort of personality. I rather like to think that we might be friends if it weren’t for the whole nurse / patient relationship we have going on.

[but back to the story]

Nurse J filled me in on all my stats- all my blood work looked great, chemo should mostly be out of my system, a slightly elevated sodium count (wait? what? I blame the Easter ham).

And before we hung up, Nurse J spoke the words I’ve been longing to hear since August when this mess all began

Well, lady, it looks like you’re in the clear.

I quickly hung up the phone knowing that I couldn’t keep my voice from cracking with emotion. That the fight I waged, the worry I’ve felt, the panic I’ve tried to keep at bay, and the emotions I’ve been flooded with

are all over.

Almost 8 months in the making. And I’m finally free at last.

Thank you- from the bottom of my ever so thankful heart- for being the best cheering squad this girl could have ever imagined. I hope that sharing (even over-sharing at points) my story has helped at least one person through a dark period. Because as I’ve said all along to my close friends and family, I’m tough and if it’s meant for me to go through this to helps someone else, I’ll gladly bear that burdeon.

& now (thankfully) the worst is over and the rest of my (our) lives is dangling in the distance.

I can’t wait to see what it has in store for me. for us.

Breathe in, breathe out, move on.
oxo

*this Jimmy Buffett song was used by a family friend of ours who’s son was battling Leukemia last year. each blog post Newell made, he closed with breathe in, breathe out, move on

I know I carried on yesterday about how I try very, very hard to keep my diet as clean as I can

but sometimes I cave and am stuck drooling over my very favorite pizza of all time [the BLT ‘za from CPK]

only to discover that it’s no longer on the menu!!! What the what?! Say it ain’t so, guys!!!

rest in peace, my fair pizza friend (photo via)

& in other news— time for me to get my ass into the kitchen and replicate this, stat!

What’s your all-time favorite pizza?

You all know my affinity for fitness- a happy body is an athletic body [endorphins FTW!] and while physical activities can be the key to a well-rounded lifestyle, I happen to believe that working on your mental fitness is just as important as making time for your Thursday afternoon jog.

Your brain breaks down if it does not get constant exercise in the form of challenging activities (think mental games, deep conversations, word puzzles). What can I say—the brain is a muscle after all! Therefore it’s important [in addition to your regular yoga sessions of course] to implement doses of mind work. One way of participating in “Brain Training” is to play strategic games. You know- ones involving strategy (duh). Something simple like a crossword puzzle or Sudoku found in the morning paper can help in keeping your mental faculties fit in addition to warding off stress and other coping disorders.

For an ideal brain exercise, my first inclination is turn to the card game we all know and love: poker. Now, I can see you asking yourself: “EPH, how is it that poker requires mental abilities?” Contrary to popular belief that poker is a game of chance, I happen to think of Poker as a game of strategy. Strategy in requiring you to measure your opponent, determining when to play your hand or when to fold, and when planning your next move. Poker instills in its players superior analytical skills. So the next time you face someone at a poker table, or participate at an online poker tournament over at partypoker, don’t merely cross your fingers and hope for the best—use your tactics to decide if you’ll go all in. In fact, in the definition of poker it’s mentioned that “the long-run success of poker players is determined by their actions chosen on the basis of probability, psychology, and game theory” (source: Wikipedia).

Strategy my friends. Strategy.

If you have a smartphone it’s not difficult to download games that provide mental stimulation. Prime example— for iPhone users, there’s even a game category dedicated to storing your gaming apps. According to Google Play, brain and logic games are the most downloaded category of apps for smartphones. And for you Android users, the tech website AppBrain.com enumerates popular brain and puzzle games which are available for download such as Reversi, WordPlay Assistant, partypoker, Bejeweled, Logo Quiz and Flow Free will make our minds work aside from keeping you entertained. So while you’re making your athletic plans for the week, try to squeeze in a few minutes of mental gaming each day so you can be sure your brain gets the proper exercise it needs.

((this is a sponsored post but all thoughts, text, and opinions are my own))

And after the storm,
I run and run as the rains come
And I look up, I look up,
on my knees and out of luck,
I look up.

Night has always pushed up day
You must know life to see decay
But I won’t rot, I won’t rot
Not this mind and not this heart,
I won’t rot.

And I took you by the hand
And we stood tall,
And remembered our own land,
What we lived for.

And there will come a time, you’ll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.

And now I cling to what I knew
I saw exactly what was true
But oh no more.
That’s why I hold,
That’s why I hold with all I have.
That’s why I hold.

And I won’t die alone and be left there.
Well I guess I’ll just go home,
Oh God knows where.
Because death is just so full and man so small.
Well I’m scared of what’s behind and what’s before.

And there will come a time, you’ll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.
[Mumford & Sons // After the Storm]

Em posted these lyrics [from a Mumford & Sons favorite] this morning as she reflected on the progress her Daddy has made over the past year. A year that she and her family didn’t think they would be given with their Patriarch.

I also posted this song [back in August]. A dear friend far away in Japan had emailed it to me as I was trudging through the muck of loss. The song had so much meaning to me buried in those verses- just as it does for Em.

It’s miraculous to me; to watch life come full circle. To see the extra days that we’ve been blessed with, to carry our stories along with us- tucked tightly in our backpacks along with our box of Kleenex and our cameras to document the road we travel. And it’s even more amazing to me that music paves the way for so much of this. For two [three, four, one thousand] very different souls on two very different journeys and yet connected. Here. By this virtual world and this song. With words that hold so many different meanings for us all but that no doubt connect us on an unparalleled wavelength.

Life is funny that way, no?

And as I (we) move forward, I can listen to this and remember where I came from, what I went through, and let go with peace knowing that it’s all firmly planted in the past.

Here’s to moving forward with grace. For health and happiness & Emily’s Daddy…
oxo

This evening, as I shut down my computer, push in my desk chair, and pack up for the day…

I realize that I have a whole host of things I could rattle off on this here space that I’m thankful for.

Instead I’ll leave it at that— I’m just thankful.

oxo